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Poll: Zombies VS. Pirates

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Yeeeeaaaarrrrrr! Shiver me timbers!

When it comes to showdowns, nothing is more classic than the original Ninjas VS. Pirates. We’ve discussed ninjas and zombies in the past here on the zombiephiles, but until now, we hadn’t touched on the topic of pirates. But all of that is about to change.

Just who would win in an epic battle between zombies and pirates? Pirates are surely clever, shifty guys, but would their peglegs prevent them from fleeing the throngs of brain-craving zombies? On a boat, would they be able to escape, or would the fact that zombies can’t drown put them at a disadvantage? On the other hand, how would zombies fare against the cold steel of a pirate cutlass or the blast of a blunderbuss?

The answers to these questions are in your hands, zombiephiles. Who’d end up walking the plank – zombies, or pirates?

Zombies VS Pirates

View Results


  1. I voted for pirates this time because “blades don’t need reloading”…then again, if they’re drunk, they might not do so well…

    P.S. I actually have a website called pirates vs zombies LOL

  2. Why am I not remotely surprised that you’ve got a pirates vs. zombies website, Ursula? Can we get a link?

  3. Josella

    Ah hah me ‘earties, pieces of eight etc.,
    ‘Zombies can’t drown’ is that an estabished fact? They may sink at some point if they’re wearing heavy clothes and boots? Also decomposing flesh will likely attract the sharks, is ‘Zombies v sharks’ an entirely separate matter? Do modern day MK47-weilding Somali buccaneers count? More questions than answers at the moment for a land-lumber like Josella.

  4. adene

    Pirate have guns and cannons.

    Just sayin’.

  5. We need a new “vs.” poll!!

    How about predators vs. zombies?


    I’m thinking zombies because most piratey naval battles were long distance fire and reload situations, and that would have little to no effect on zombies. Ultimately pirates grapple the boat and climb aboard to scavenge and thus get eaten. Their guns were little more than cannons, they still had to reload them after every shot unless it was a double barrel and even then they could only take out one at a time.
    If we are looking at a zombie attack while at port, its a good bet pirates could escape… but in all likelihood due to poor medical knowledge amongst pirates they would most likely become infected, diseases and sicknesses ran rampant on ships back then. Usually if you were so sick you might threaten others, you might find yourself with a cannon ball stapped to your boots.

  7. JezreelCowboy

    I agree with AstraDaemon!!!!!
    But probably, Predators will survive!!!
    They’ve got that brutal strength!!!

  8. gottmituns

    there is not a lot of pirates. compared to millions of zombies.

  9. gottmituns

    Totally agree in case of Predator. Predators can kick anyone’s ass. they are very durable.

  10. gottmituns

    plus, i do not think green blood of predator taste very good.

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