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The worst places to go when zombies attack.

Okay, zombiephiles – Here’s my list (in no particular order) of the worst places to go when the zombies come lookin’ for an unhappy meal.

  1. Hiding in a loft/attic – there is often only one way in and out, so you are pretty much trapped.
  2. Shopping centers/malls – this was a popular attraction before the living became the undead, so its only natural to assume that a lot of undead people would end up here. After all they are in search of living people and this is where everyone would expect to find them.
  3. Crowded cities – This is the area where the most living once resided, so its only natural that its going to be full of zombies, and what do zombies want to do? EAT YOU!
  4. Supermarkets – These are extremely dangerous places to go because they have too many walls and shelves blocking your view. so you will be unable to see those zombies lurkin around the corners. the areas are very compact so you can easily get blocked in by 10-15 zombies.
  5. Rooftops – These can be your best or worst friend. They are the best place if you use them correctly, although they can leave you trapped and unable to get away from the zombies who are preparing for a feast. Even if the zombies can’t make it on the roof you could still be in real trouble; zombies are really persistent and will crowd and the roof leaving you unable to get down.

Okay! I hope this helped, Zombiephiles! Happy huntin’, and REMEMBER – always know your exits!

If you're as zealous about zombie survival strategizing as shrews24, you should probably head over to our Zombie Forums, a place where zombie-crazed zombiephiles come together to debate and argue on the best (and worst) ways to survive a zombie outbreak.

Moans.

  1. Jess A.

    i like it…haha

  2. Will the Dead

    you failed to mention a few big ones
    bad time during the first wave:
    -police station: swarms of people looking for protection will turn into a mob. you will be killed by your own people.

    -Gun shops: Want to get a bullet in the head from a anger gun shop owner? be my guest atleast he’ll put you morons down clean.

    -Hospital: if you can go to the hospitals during the first wave and come back breathing, Tell me all about it, I’d love to see what hell on earth looks like.

    -city hall: another mob looking for answers such as “what are you gonna do to save me?” every fat bastard in a suit and tie will lie while thinking “we are gonna do nothing, now how am I gonna get out of here?”

    that’s all for now

  3. Joemomma icup

    DON’T READ THIS IF YOU WANT TO HEAR SOMETHING IMPORTANT
    Zombies are stupid!!! Their hungry like the fat chick
    across the street from Dairy Queen. What’s yall problem
    the safe place to be is Bill Gates house GOD get it right. He could bribe the zombies into not eating you.
    And invest in making a virus that turns us into zombie kicking werewolves. or werebears. By now you know im working with a investigation team to fing out why everyone is still reading this. GOODBYE america.
    I LOVE YOU ALL.

    BUT NOT YOU BECAUSE YOU SMELL LIKE ROTTING ICECREAM AND YOU KEEP TRYING TO BITE ME. GET OVER IT! I’M THROUGH WITH YOU MARISSA. :< BUT I STILL HATE ZOMBIES.
    I'M SORRY MICHEAL JACKSON.:(

  4. Can’t forget Walmart.. lots of windows and a lot of rednecks with the same idea “lets run to Walmart”… it’s Deathmart

  5. you forgot 1 more a school
    therte will be alot of kids there
    they may seem freindly dont fall for it

  6. Alhazred

    hospitals.
    police stations.
    city hall.
    fire dept.
    airports.
    churches, mosques, etc.
    highways & interstates.
    banks.
    sporting arenas.
    shopping centers.
    schools.
    parks.
    pools.
    morgues.

    anywhere with an abundance of easily attainable melee weapons….*shudders*

    ************your ex-wife’s house.*************

    (oops. sorry hank. i thought you were a zombie… told you i’d get the house in the end. *snickers*)

    or. well. anywhere really. you’re honestly pretty fucked unless you happen to be a total badass. like me. *flexes* …then again… i don’t think i’d hold up too well mentally if i had to witness my loved ones being munched on. maybe a tall building would be a good idea. with hard pavement at the bottom… :’/

  7. joboy0316

    Some Churches and Mosques are actually safe, given the big heavy doors in case of forced entry. Windows high above ground. And as a last resort the Church bell for signal to nearby help. Also Schools are already given fortifications somehow like a correctional facility, gate surrounding the school, a cafeteria, a clinic, library to keep you entertained as well as the gym for physical conditioning. A Workshop for making weapons!!! It’s also possible to use gym/sports equipment to your advantage. like baseball bats. Schools most likely have a flag, use it for signals. If your school has a combat varsity team, like escrima, most likely they have escrima sticks. Think about factors that contribute to a possible safe havem.

  8. joboy0316

    *HAVEN

  9. Zam138

    How about an insane asylum? Wait, no, that’d be easily defendable, having to be used to riots before the outbreak… Oh well, never mind. But I have to disagree with the whole city hall riots reasoning. It’d be a zombie magnet and they’d all be dead before long. So it’s not a human cause for danger, it’s the immediate aftereffects.

  10. dzombieguy

    well if your smart and see the effects of an outbreak before everyone ase, go around looting shops BEFORE THE PANIC and get around doing everything important like reinforcing your car. then when the panic hits go to your defendable spot (in my case, the local school) and bring back every survivor you find without a bite.get round to fortifying, divide labour , plan raids on shops, establish your government and start digging your vegetable gardens. by the way im raidng armouries and sports shops as well, so if you live in havant, england, and your plan heads tits up, just head to prospect school:)

  11. UberZombienerd

    I like some people collect swords and guns so I have a pretty good arsenal also when I had my house built I had it reinforced with lead my windows are bullet proof and I have an emergency bunker 50 ft underground with 6 different exits and one entrance so if you really need a place to hunker down I even bought a plot of land on the moon so when we leave the planet to the zombies I’ll have a place to build civilization

  12. Anthony

    If zombies attack imma go to Harlem lets be serious what zombie wants to go harlem

  13. Jarred

    first off, some of the places are actually very good to hide at. second, a roof is a good place to be FYI 1/10 zombies can climb stairs. third, buy lots of treadmills place them around your house when the zombies come and just sit on your roof with a few guns, water, food, and something to keep you safe from the elements of nature. You’ll be good to go for awhile. When they come I’ll be heading to Lincoln,MI. Good luck. Hope you don’t get bitten by one of them.

  14. I disagree with #1–see “Night of the Living Dead” (1990)–the one guy that survived (aside from red-headed Barbara) hid in the attic–it had the kind of stairs you can pull up into the attic with you, so the zombies can’t shuffle up them. Bring some water, munchies, your cell phone, and a blanket to cover the door so they can’t smell you, and you’re golden till help comes. Unless you’re that one a-hole, like in “NotLD” (1990), and the heroine comes back to blast your stupid head.

Zombies moan. Zombiephiles moan back.

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